my body is exhausted from all the physical and recreational activity i have been doing this month, especially this week. i think i have been noticing changes in my body, yay. im still a fatty, but whatever... progress.
it's pretty obvious i'll never be a size zero... nor would i ever want to be one... cuz hen i'd look like every other no shape Filipino girl on the planet. Ewwwwww, so nasty. i love my breasts, hips, and the rump i call a bum... and regardless of how much i work out... im not gonna lose those! Which is why i am convinced that when i do lose more weight, and tone it all up... my body will be similar... but clearly not as amazing as Kim Kardashians. She's sooo effing hot. I wanna be like her, and release a sex tape, and sell it. Kidding.
check the way she still has mad curves. yeaaap, thats gonna be me. *fingers crossed* haha. I mean im pretty confident that my body isnt gonna look ugly when i lose weight. I have been slim before, and my body was pretty decent. Sooo you knowwww. Lets pray for the best, shall we.
Everyone i know is getting in shape, and it's awesome. It'll all be worth it once summer comes around. I mean shoot, whats the point of working at a bikini store if i dont get to buy and wear (and look good in) the damn things. Beach bodies y'all. Beach bodies!
BTW: to anyone who needs a discount on bathing suits, swimwear. i can get 20% off swimming apparel. BUT if your sizes are similar to mine... i can probably pass it off as personal purchase and get you 40% or 50% off. Just sayn. Good Karma Y'all!
Im a person with too many plans. I have made numerous plans with numerous amounts of people, and yet if asked what my plans are i could never recall all of them, or any. So i decided to blog out all my 'plans'. I will write them according to the people i have plans with. If you would like to make plans with me, feel free to comment, or call my phone :) I am always down for plans
Calvin
go to the great coral reef in australia (might as well, since we're prob gna go to med school there)
At twenty-six, go to LA... and drink
go to miami & blast pitbull from our rental car
watch The Strokes live
watch Daft Punk live
watch misc. movies on DVD
we still need to go on our "twenty-first century date" in which i was the guy, and you were the girl... yeah i still remember
go sleep in Paris
wake up in Tokyo
have a dream in New Orleans
fall in love in Chicago (not to eachother)
go to great wolf lodge
go on a random road trip
go see coldplay before they break up
fly a kite
go to the ROM
go to ikea
buy a book
write our fucked up story in that book
Jessica
When we're 21, go to the states
go to New York again
go to europe
go to hawaii and surf
learn how to long board
go to the SXSW festival
go to Coachella
go on a cruise
go to a whole bunch of 19+ shows, 'cuz you know... we're 19 now
party hipster style
go to kariya park and have a photoshoot
go to our cute spot and have starbucks
make lamingtons
make lemonade
make videos
vintage shopping
holiday sweater shopping
watch movies.
work at american apparel at the same time, along with caroline
wild vines party
drink a box of wine with dixie cups
go to the zoo, and touch the fur or a lemur
Krystle
go to brasil after our undergrad years
get sexy
get sexy and rub oil on our bodies, like in that enur calabria video
go to caribanna & wear hella tacky clothes
buy lululemon pants
buy tna pants
buy monokinis, put shorts over them, and go clubbing
go clubbing
buy those 3 dollar coronas at the wings place beside her house
go shopping in buffalo
Caroline
live together during med school
go to med school together
work at american apparel at the same time along with sica
canadas wonderland water park
picnics
who else do i have plans with? That's enough for now.
NTS: go to chapters or a store that sells really nice stationery.
i might not know your name, but i know every curve of your body, and thats got to mean more than a few couple of letters and a space in between.
today in soc class: Hot Prof: Are the lights okay? Class: Nooo. *hot prof turns off one row of lights* Hot Prof: Better? or should i turn off one more row? Class: One more. *hot prof turns off one more row of lights* Me: Yeah, thats good. Hot Prof: It's good? alright awesome. *I turn to Krystle* Me: Omg, i talked to him... sort of.
I get to see my boy tomorrow. He's from vegas. We've had an on and off relationship since i've been in grade 10. I thought he was the one. I always said, God broke the mould after he created my boy. I thought he was cute when he wore eyeliner and pouted his lips. He's into wearing feathers and sequins now. He usually has some sexy scruff facial hair going on. He doesnt dance much... he just kind of jives. I'm down with that. I know i am in love. He's only here for a night though. So i gotta make tomorrow worthwhile. I cant wait to see my boy, Brandon...Brandon Flowers. Oh yeah, he's bringing his friends too... The Killers.
Apparently if you dream of movie theatres, this means you have seen your parents have sex... and that you long to see people having sex. And if you dream about the number 3, you're dreaming about male genitals. Oh psychoanalysis. What a treat <3
one year since heath has been gone.. really? shoot.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
my sister is currently high, calling from 5 and 10. WOW. I would normally say some bad things, but i have this irrational fear if i say something bad, something bad will happen to her. haha, like that one time i was really bitchy on the phone... and i felt bad for being a bitch, so i sent my sister a text msg saying sorry, cuz i was just in a really bad mood. if something happened to her, god knows... surely i would... probably, and literally kill myself. so i wont say anything, other than she better come home tonight safe.
I really dont know why she does some of the things she does, nor does she know why i do some of the things i do. I guess we're even. Ugh, i hate being the big sister sometimes, because i get mad too easily, and worry too much. It's easier to act like i dont give a fuck, but when in reality, i care too much. To the point where after i hang up the phone, i call back, and be like... just fucking come home soon, and... but still keeping that bitchy tone... but really i just want her home, so i know where she is, and that shes safe.
I have some sort of like emergency scenario playlists in my head, of things that can go wrong when my sister is out. Sometimes it's overwhelming, so i shove the thoughts way back, so i dont have to think about it... but the feeling of anxiety is always there. I guess i have to put a lot of trust into her, and trust the fact that she knows what she's doing, and that she trusts whos shes out with. It's Hard.
I dont think i'll ever stop thinking about Andrea in that way. I'll refuse to believe the fact that shes turning 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 25, 30, 35....etc etc 70. To me, shes still my likkle choba, that called cell phones celery phones, and gloves... glums. So its not my fault i worry too much.
for me to learn the lyrics to this song, means that i will have to sneak in karaoke sessions in my basement.. preferably when my parents arent home... cuz i dont want them to hear my white washed tagalog singing voice. Not to mention, how retarded im going to sound trying to sound out all the words i dont know. Oh geez. So stoked.
bukas na lang kita mamahalinnnnnn(8) rough translation...tomorrow instead, i will love you? i will love you tomorrow instead? HAHAHA sounds way better in tagalog.
Yeeee distillation lab today! Totally will be singing in my head.
lab = lame. last one there.... broke a flask. Hot.
the 'best playlist' consists of: T-Pain ft Ludacris - Chopped n Skrew'd MGMT vs Justice - electric feel remix loft - mallorca 50 cent - candy shop three six mafia - smoking on da dro 50 cent - bitch get in my car Varsity Fanclub - Future Love && some other stuff that i wasnt paying attention too, cuz i was listening to other things.
My uncle is the coolest uncle ever. we were jammin in his room to Lady Gaga & B.Spears, youtubing obese people. thats love. <3
anyway i am currently listening to tagalog songs... kind of awesome, kind of embarassing. really and truly, i never really pay attention to the lyrics to tagalog songs... but they are just pretty epic...i think most of them are about heart break and loss and things.
i bought a bathing suit last night. i actually had the bathing suit on hold for a while, and finally bought it yesterday. 50 bucks :) well considering, it was like 200 dollars before it was marked down, and then with my 50% off discount. So yeah, pretty sweet. Sorina ended up buying her suits she put on hold as well. I also had a Bistro wrap from lettuce eatery, and it was soo effing good. Ugh, i love that place <3. 3 people complimented me on my scarf last night, i felt pretty rad not gonna lie. Ohh, you know what else i had last night? A grapefruit italian soda. Fucking best bro.
anyway, after work, calvin txt'd me to go swimming. obviously, i was stoked considering i had just bought a new bathing suit. Swimming was pretty fun, i kind of just waded around, and just sat by the stairs or on cal or whatever. Spent most of my time in the mens sauna, because it was freaking cold. So cold my lips were purple. I had to hide and stuff from any old men who wanted to come into the sauna. Luckily didnt get caught :) Went home, and wanted to shower. I googled, how to remove chlorine smell out of hair... and in this one post.. someone said that vinegar works. Sooo i tried it. it kind of worked... the chlorine smell isnt as strong, compared to past times in where i didnt use vinegar. So ghetto.
i've been pretty good, with the whole eat healthier thing. i had a quiche and a salad today.. pretty rad, pretty rad.
time for bullet form, things that bother me
When people put music on their bloggers...esp when there is no music player... so i cant press pause. ESP! when its a stupid song. Reason: it means i have to mute my music (which i'd much rather listen to). Plus, dont you think the music just take away from whats written? How am i supposed to know how sad you were, on whatever day, if your blog is singing some so last year hip hop single. Youtube links preferred, thanks.
Lil' Wayne. Reason: The music's good... he just scares the fuck out of me.
Asian girls with brown died hair, and hella grown out roots. Reason: That's ugly as fuck
Girls. Reason: they're cunts. i mean, look at me.
When girls dont know how to flush toilets. Reason: do i even NEED a reason?
When Bobby called me at fucking 8am. Reason: it was 8am... i have class at 11. I wanted to sleep.
i dont see people as often as i used to
brokencyde
emo/screamo/electro/hardcore bands
the fact that my heart sometimes aches, but there is nothing "I" can do about it anymore.
DRAKE. you heard me. He should be in a wheelchair hating life on degrassi.
I think thats all for whats bothering me at the moment.
Things that i like.
my blackberry
cranberry juice
salads/vegetables/soups/wraps
bob marley
my tv in my room works again. No cable. Just a DVD player :)
killers concert next week... i dont know any new songs... i dont really care.
8 am-ish, waiting for my anatomy and physio lecture (which starts at 9) decided i was gonna do that 16 random facts thing, that people started doing on blogger a while back. Literally, i tried to write my 16 facts before.... got to like the third fact and got bored. So, now i am going to make an honest attempt, and hopefully finish it.
1. I hate smiling
2. I love being naked
3. When I take showers, I sit on the tub floor.
4. I have a thing for guys with facial hair
5. I get turned on watching guys do what they love
6. I spend way too much time watching online television
7. I think about sex too much... way too much
8. I like the feeling when you breathe in, in the winter, and your nosehairs freeze
9. I am overly sarcastic, rude and bitchy
10. I've loved the color purple since before it was the "in" color
11. I have watched Superbad, Jackass 2 and Knocked Up over maybe 50 times.... each.
12. I'm on Alesse, (HAHAHA)
13. I have reason to believe im a really good kisser (hey, just saying)
14. If i dont kill school this semester, my life is over.
15. I flush the toilet Mid-Pee
16. I would much rather stay in with friends, than go out with friends
omfg. ATL... are you kidding me. Back when I used to braid only one side of my head. Crimp my hair. Wear hella black makeup. Wore wife-beaters, shorts and high socks. Watched BET religiously. Rocked those Dollhouse shoes aka (Sneaker Heels) HAHAHAHA. Oh wow.
so i spent my whole morning watching movies. my afternoon picking up 1 dollars worth of drugs, then spending the day at Cal's. Watched the Raptors lose, listened to his same playlist about like... 5 times, watch the OC, and bicker a lot. Only for his cousin to walk in on Calvin eating tuna, and me sitting cross legged on the couch. Classy right? anyway then I spent the evening at Swiss Chalet with my family. Left dindin, to pick up maui, and make it back to our food. My family basically argued about leaving tip, and how much is enough, or not enough. It got annoying. I jammed to aimees iPod most of the night. On the way home, angey and i made up a little hand dance to Cut Copy... reminiscent of our vintage car dance of like 2-3 years ago now? Shiiiit. And now, im sitting here listening to some gay lil wayne song, trying to finish this ugly ass flow chart. I think im gna watch Pineapple Express Again.
Anyway, I took my first birth control pill today (to regulate my period)... im wondering if im gonna feel any different during the week or whatever. You know, because of the hormone changes and shit.
little pings and pangs now and then. you know when you want something out of your head, but you just end up thinking about it even more? yeah thats me right now. Ugh.
Anyway, im working on my self-confidence.
I wanna daaaaance.
stuck in my head. maybe i should get the lingerie. PFT.
friday. finished class at 12. downtown with my UTM boys. the sketchiest bus seats ever. annihilated the fuck out of my no bum. walk walk walk eatons center bell the source bell, next stores $150 shan swimwear, rating.. a twelve. Queen -- HMV. Pineapple Express, thanks Judd Apatow No kicks. Home. Swim. Teaching How to Swim. Floating. water. sauna. Home Home. Pooped. i washed my hair 3 times... still smells like chlorine. Pooooooooooped!
early morning blogging at the utm library, waiting for my 9 am class, listening to ms erykah badu. on repeat. i looked up my booklist, and its gonna be pricey. Ugh. I hate you school. Robbing my dad's money, which he could be using on buying me other things (im kidding).
today is another day of working out with my krystle deseezy. (btw, as much as i hate this whole 'eezy' to the name... it's so hard to stop). Yeah. I finish at 2 today. Thats the earliest i'll finish every week :( Someone switch out of their tuesday/thursday tutorial, pleaaaaaaase. hate you.
i feel like im rambling.
naps + 7.5 hour sleep = a good mood carla.
I should probably eat something.
NTS: Call tita weng & uncle nato, and ask them if they will pay for my hot yoga membership instead of buying me clothes for xmas.
Im thinking if i go to hot yoga/power yoga like 3 times a week or something, for a month... that should do some work right? I'm also considering going back to pescetarianism... but that just might be a total bust, since i have like no self control, and love food too much. Think Think Think. Too early for this type of thing.
Just letting the Badu soak in.
ooh you know you rock my world and you bboy and i bbgirl and, it dont stop until the break of dawwwwwwwwn -- guaranteed stuck in my head all day.
i really love two of my bestfriends. spent the night just lounging at Caroline's humble home. talking about big titties, gay boys, work, other stuff. got into the would you rathers, then do date or dumps. basically cried most of the night.
fuck i love them.
in a few hours me and sica will be going to see Karim at York. Woop. Road trips. Then we're gonna get crunks at Kalayaan. Ydig.
cute cousin date. Oakville with Charm Che and Angey babes. East Side Marios & Demetres. White people & No tipping. Just cute <3
so sad, but so stoked. retiring my Kat Von D calendar :( but introducing new The Office Calendar for '09 baby! even more stoked, cuz it was a lucky find at Shoppers Drug Mart + it was 3 dollars. Blaow.
Excited.
so i got my period, which i am always very excited for. Meaning i am normal, and more importantly am not preggo, heeeey. And it means that im not AS fat as i think i am, because PMS = Bloating. Thus, having a period, makes you not bloated aka thinner (or at least a bit of the illusion) Super stokedddddddd. Anyway, still contemplating if im gonna go on the pill to regulate my period, since its been coming pretty regular for like 3 months now. Other than my menstrual cycle, im planning to do yoga again. Im gonna try and get a monthly pass or something, and see how that goes.
Im craving good music.
I already miss christmas.
"would you rather... open eyed, kiss TPain, WITHOUT his glasses? OR suck lil' waynes penis + both options you catch a disease"
holy fuck, i miss you so much. this mental anesthesia can only work for so long. visit me sometimes.
have a happy 2009 everyone. this is probably really generic, but i hope 2009 is a good one for all of you guys! and i pray you juice 2009 for all that its worth <3
so 2008 went out pretty hard... i first had my last minute miracle, downed a whole bottle of vodka, and spent the wee hours of 2009, vomiting out 2008. gnarly morning.
its gonna take a while adjusting... you know, writing 09, and not 08 on the upper right corners of my papers.
going out in a few hours with my cousins, it should be a good time :)
